Sunday, March 8, 2009

52 PIECES OF ME WEEK-6

THE AFTERNOON AFTER TOMMY'S SON PLANTED ALL THE TREES AND PLANTS AT THE MEMORIAL SIGHT IT BEGAN TO RAIN AND IT RAINED ALL OF THAT NIGHT AND THE NEXT DAY UNTIL THAT AFTERNOON. ALL OF TOMMY'S FAMILY WAS IN TOWN AND AT THIER HOUSE SO I TOOK SOME WOOD AND WENT TO VISIT SO WE COULD ALL HAVE A NICE AFTERNOON TOGETHER. WHILE I WAS THERE IT STOPPED RAINING AND IT BEGAN TO SNOW. I TOLD THEM I HAD TO LEAVE BECAUSE IF THE STREETS IN CORO LAKE GET SLICK YOU CAN'T GO ANYWHERE BECAUSE OF THE HILLS AND CURVES.

I RAN TO GET SOME WINE. WHY YOU CAN'T HAVE A GREAT SNOW DAY WITHOUT WINE. I STOPPED BY THE HOUSE AND GOT ELIZABETH SO WE COULD RIDE AROUND OUR LAKE AND SEE THE BEAUTIFUL SNOW FALL. WE DID AND ENDED UP BY TOMMY'S MEMORIAL SIGHT. WHEN WE GOT OUT OF THE CAR WE NOTICED DOWN IN THE SPILLWAY THE WATER WAS RUSHING OVER THE ROCKS AND LOOKED SO BEAUTIFUL WITH THE SNOW FALLING ON THE LAKE TOO. WE HAD FOUND A TREASURE OF A SPOT RIGHT UNDER OUR NOSE THAT WE NEVER NOTICED WAS THERE BEFORE. SO WITH CAMERA IN HAND WE WENT DOWN BY THE WATER AND I BEGAN TO RELAX FROM THE HORRIBLE FEELING OF LOSS AND SADNESS WATCHING THE MEMORIAL BEING MADE.

AT LAST I HAD FOUND A PEACEFUL PLACE AND IT WAS RIGHT NEXT TO TOMMY'S MEMORIAL. WE STAYED THERE TAKING PICS LISTENING TO THE WATER RUN OVER THE ROCKS AND THE SNOW FALL SO THICK AND BIG HUGE FLAKES COVERING ALL OF OUR SURROUNDINGS.

WHEN GOD CLOSES A DOOR HE ALWAYS OPENS A WINDOW. THE QUESTION IS WHEN WE HAVE SUCH A HUGE LOSS ARE WE LOOKING SO HARD AND SO LONG AT THE CLOSED DOOR THAT WE CAN NOT NOTICE THE WINDOW THAT IS OPEN OR IF WE DO NOTICE THE WINDOW ARE WE WISE ENOUGH TO STOP LOOKING AT THE CLOSED DOOR AND ENJOY THE WINDOW BEING OPEN.

TOMMY HAD TAUGHT ME TO DO THAT WHEN MY HUSBAND DIED IN SO MANY WAYS AND NOW I AM WISE ENOUGH TO DO IT WITH HIM NOW THAT IT IS HIS TIME TO GO HOME TO BE WITH THE LORD AND THE LOAD IS NOT AS HEAVY AND THE WINDOW SEEMS SO MUCH CLOSER NOW.

AS PEACE AND ACCEPTANCE OF WHAT MY LIFE WAS NOW CAME OVER ME AS I SAT THERE LISTENING TO THE WATER AND LOOKING AT HIS MEMORIAL WE ONCE AGAIN GOT INTO THE CAR AND FINISHED OUR LAKE AND NEIGHBORHOOD DRIVE.

AS SAD AS I WAS FOR THE HUGE LOSS TOMMY HAD LEFT ME FEELING BY BEING CALLED HOME WITH THE LORD SO SUDDENLY I KNEW IN MY HEART TOMMY HAD ALSO GIVEN ME THE THE WISDOM AND STRENGTH IN THE PAST 9 YRS TO CARRY ON IN PEACE, RESOLUTION AND ACCEPTANCE TO ENJOY THE REST OF MY LIFE JUST LIKE HE DID HIS LIFE EVERY SINGLE DAY AND JUST LIKE HE HAD STARTED SHOWING ME TO DO 10 YRS EARLIER OVER MY HUSBAND.

WINDOWS COMES IN MANY WAYS, SIZES AND SHAPES. IT'S UP TO US TO DECIDE TO ENJOY THE WINDOW OR TO KEEP LOOKING AT THE CLOSED DOOR. TOMMY WOULD ENJOY THE WINDOW AND THAT IS WHAT I HAVE CHOSEN TO DO AT THE SPECIAL TREASURE SPOT RIGHT NEXT TO HIS MEMORIAL BECAUSE HE TOLD ME SO MANY TIMES IN THE PAST THAT WOULD BE HIS GREATEST WISH FOR ME IF HE WERE TO EVER HAVE TO LEAVE ME.





3 comments:

  1. Very good entry Judy. Great pictures. Helen

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  2. Hi.. came to your website by way of Pharmolo's Call for Support. I'm so sorry to read that you've (for the SECOND time) lost the love of your life. It sure doesn't seem fair. Glad that you have the faith that keeps you going. Sending prayers up for you.

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  3. I'm so sorry for your loss. Praying for you.

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